Year after year cook books and diet books are the biggest seller1, how not to eat it once you’ve learned2 how to cook it. To sell a diet book you need some crazy idea of what to eat or not to eat. Here’s a peanut butter diet book, the ice cream diet book, the bikini diet, none of these books agrees on what you should or shouldn’t eat.
The Atkins Diet has been popular for year, Atkins make nutritionists mad by saying you can eat just about all the fat you want, as long as you don’t eat many carbohydrates3, sugar and bread. I like Atkins because I cook with butter. The Scarsdale Diet was a popular fad4 for several years, it’s a chart in here indicating what you ought to weigh. It Says a woman five feet four ought weigh between 110 and 123 pounds. If you’re a man five foot eight, Doctor Tarnower said you should weigh between 137 and 153 pounds. Well I’m a man five foot eight, who weighs between 205 and 206 pounds, according to him I should be six feet six inches tall.
Doctor Phil has a new book out, looks good but I’d be afraid Doctor Phil’s diet might make bald. The Pritikin Diet, everything is non-fat milk in these diets. That’s why kids aren’t drinking milk anymore: tastes like fat-free dishwater. They only have charts listing things you could eat, like half a piece of celery of 4.5 grams of applesause. Is there anyone who knows what a gram of applesauce look like?
This is the most popular book these days, the South Beach Diet Book. There are some surprises in here, it ahs a list of foods to avoid and one of them is apples. Maybe that’s because apples are bad for the doctor’s business, “an apple a day keeps a doctor without pay.”
You’ve all seen the diet ads at the back of bad magazines, before after, she took Hydroxycut to lose weight. Before, midpoint, after, boy, she’s had that bathing suit a long while. If I really wanted to lose weight though I know what I’d do, I’d cut my eyebrows5.